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Puritanical Homecoming and Other Musings

Breakfast on Sunday morning was interesting conversation.  It was the morning after the homecoming dance and we were asking the kids how the evening went.  It really wasn’t what I expected.  We were regaled with stories of breathalyzers, security guards and kids being kicked out for inappropriate dancing.  The morality police were out in force.  I was actually shocked to hear all this.  What happened to the days of parents and teachers chaperoning?  I guess it’s not in the union contract.  As for volunteering, I’m a bit surprised no parents were there because you’re a second class citizen in this culture if you don’t volunteer for everything.  What we’ve evolved to is hiring security guards to breathalyze and terrorize the kids at a social function. 

I had confirmation from three different teenagers that there were approximately 20 security guards onsite.  Was this a Charger/Raider game?  Is the TSA on campus?  At least the teens have a healthy dose of teenage rebellion in them.  I was told many of them pretended they were drunk just to mess with the security guards and got pulled over to a secondary inspection where they had to recite the alphabet.  They danced inappropriately just to get tossed out for ten minutes to sneak back in.  I thought Footloose was just a movie.  Was Kevin Bacon at Rancho?  I want an autograph.

This has spurred other thoughts I’ve had on homecoming, but just hadn’t simmered to the surface yet.  For all our trying to stamp out class warfare and racism, it sure is evident innocently and innocuously at the homecoming football game half time.  There is the homecoming court which suggests royalty, which is seniors only, no underclassmen allowed.  All the court is white except for one black which is probably true of those demographics, but what of the demographic of the school being 50 percent latino?  You have the pageantry team rolling out the red carpet and bowing to the court as they walk down.  I could really care one way or the other.  I just find it interesting that no matter how far we go into trying to control things, some things just are uncontrollable like stamping out class warfare and racism and we all know that by just watching the news anymore.

Our hypocrisy blows me away.

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Occupied

The 99% are trying to send a message to the 1%.  I get it.  I truly do.  My sympathies are with them.  Naturally, I always surprise myself with how conservative I am on some issues and how liberal I am on others.  I have also been reading Mein Kampf by Adolf Hitler.  Why?  In reality, I’m kind of a history nut and a World War II nut.  Some most interesting reading with a lot of parallels to some of our current conditions.  Hitler offered that the 1% were too arrogant and disregarded the lower classes when it wouldn’t have been much skin off their backs to give them a better wage, better living conditions and thus a better life.  He had a real insight into the lives of the lower classes and how there was no opportunity to raise yourself up.  His main warning was that by ignoring the lower classes you gave the communists a free reign on spreading their ideas throughout the populace, mainly the unions.  The fear wasn’t just communism as we know, but also something Hitler himself seemed to get off the ground called fascism.

I agree that these economic conditions have gone on for long enough.  What’s the solution?  I don’t know, I’m just a simple blogger.  My sense of the situation is that the civil unrest seen in other countries for whatever reasons has been held at bay here in the U.S. partially due to the government constantly extending unemployment benefits, but that doesn’t seem to be working anymore and I’m glad because it looks like it’s going to take the masses to get it through to our politicians that we need some real reform to get capital to flow again.  I really don’t lie within any ideology of the protesters.  I want government out of my life.  I want real leadership.

The only wisdom, if you call it that, that I could impart to the protesters is the following from the Declaration of Independence, “All Men are Created Equal.”  This doesn’t mean we end up equal.  This is still the one place in the world where you can get up, quit your job and move to Idaho if you wanted.  You have an incredible freedom of  movement.  You have the ability to create a business, an idea, a product, a service or just about anything else.  You can do it by yourself, with a partner or with a bunch of people.  It’s called competition.  Instead of sitting on the sidewalk doing what you see as productive, get in the game.  Start something, do something, be something.  You don’t have to be the next Steve Jobs or Bill Gates.  Those guys are one of kind, but that doesn’t mean you can’t get your slice of the pie and that’s what this American game called capitalism is about.  It rewards the smart, shrewd, hard workers.  If you want an eight hour a day job, where you punch in and punch out and have no responsibility beyond that, then you’ve just limited yourself and put your future in the hands of others.  This world is full of people who limit themselves and then stick their hands out.  Don’t be one of them.  Don’t be a victim.  Be free, be responsible.

They don’t call it Yankee Ingenuity for nothing!

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Lions and Tigers and Bears Oh MY

This sure is a weird one.  If you’re an anarchist or a high saluting communist where does this event fall in the law of unintended circumstances?  If you don’t know the news story, a fellow in Ohio has his own private zoo.  For some reason last week, he decided to open all the cages and let all the animals go out into the wilderness and then he committed suicide.  This was no little private zoo with a handful of animals, but large numbers of big mammals like lions, tigers, bears and monkeys totally close to fifty animals that escaped.

I guess the first question is, in our land of one zillion laws (I’m probably breaking one right now), how did this guy ever get to the point of having a zoo this large?  A lot of these animals are hard to come by, expensive to obtain, and also expensive to maintain.  I’m guessing money was no problem for him.  In this day and age, I’m surprised he was able to pull this off.  Even if he loved the animals and they were well taken care of, he would have not only governmental agencies after him, but also animal rights activist organizations.

How about the minutes right after the release of the animals?  I’m sure it was pandemonium in the surrounding area.  I’m sure people were frightened.  Kids playing in the front yard, moms pulling into the driveway from the grocery store, dads on the freeway coming home from work to hear on the radio.  I do understand that something needed to be done and immediatley with no delay.  I am real curious to find out how the sherifff came to the decision immediately to slaughter all the animals?

Everyone was immediately quarantined to their homes.  The schools were closed and so on.  This is a somewhat rural if not totally rural area.  From what I know of rural areas most everyone owns some kind of firearm.  I also know in rural areas, they do have veterinarians and they do have tranquilizers.  Why not use them and only use the kill shot if necessary.  Tell the people with firearms to protect themselves as need be.

That is just not police mentality.  It reminds me of a few years ago, an employee of my’s brother was murdered in cold blood by the police in daylight in Carlsbad in front of his condominium.  He suffered from some kind of mental disease and had stopped taking his medication.  He was wandering the condo complex, speaking to himself and just acting strangely.  The police were called and shot him in the chest.  Bystanders said it was obvious that he had some kind of mental illness.  The police have justified it all they want, but it is what it is.

Back on topic, I’m sure the police were highly excited about the proposition of going “hunting.”  I really can’t blame them.  I understand the thrill of the hunt. I understand the thrill of tracking an animal and besting it, especially if it’s much larger than yourself.  Instead of let’s go kill all those animals, what if the sheriff said, we have every tranquilizer gun in town here, we have a bunch of volunteers and some more volunteers on their way.  We’re going to bag and tag all these animals and only kill if in danger of bodily harm. 

I’m sure the response to this is, “we didn’t have time.”  Sorry, not buying it.

The response is that the tranquilizers on hand weren’t working.  Help wasn’t on the way from Cincinnati or Cleveland or Toledo?  Bigger cities usually have a larger supply of anything. 

WSY?

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It Never Fails

No matter how organized we try to be, no matter how far in advance we try to look at the calendar and no matter what our past experiences are, we always seem to get taken by surprise.  It begs the question, are we stupid or is this just the way things are or do we just get told these things in passing at 10:30pm at night or did the teacher not post it or did the coach not know about it or does anyone even give a crap?

For instance, a young lady asked our son to a dance earlier this year.  What we would call a Sadie Hawkins dance, they call MORP(prom spelled backwards).  Well, the day of the dance a water polo tournament is scheduled.  A water polo tournament goes on all day long and is exhausting for those who do not know.  Well, let’s just say it provided a lot of stress to our son who ended up having to race home from La Jolla, jump in the shower, shove some food down his throat and meet his date at the dance.  Is this good stress or bad stress?  I guess that’s just the way life is, but it happens so often.

Prom is this Saturday night and he has had this planned and arranged now for a month.  We didn’t even know juniors could attend since at our high school only seniors were allowed to attend.  In total, we will probably be spending somewhere between two and three hundred dollars on prom.  A group of them are supposed to meet for dinner and photos at 5:30pm and then take a party bus to the venue.  Well, it turns out he made CIF swim finals that are the same day and start at 3:00pm in the afternoon.  This was a surprise to him and us because his times haven’t been good enough for consideration and  yet he has been honored with the invitation.  He would have to have the race of his life to win this thing.  What to do? 

Same goes for my daughter.  Her varsity dance team is doing a two night performance this Friday and Saturday night.  It’s a big deal.  They have been practicing long and hard all semester for this show and these young ladies are talented dancers.  You would enjoy the show.  Well, her private dance group booked a competition in Palm Springs on Saturday and Sunday.  She’s doing full rehearsals at the school and going to the studio at 9:00pm to practice for the weekend competition.  This stuff just gets out of hand.  She will be a zombie when she gets home on Sunday evening.

Can we foresee this stuff.  Well, the Mrs. and I try to really stay up on things on the calendar.  With the two school websites, twelve teacher websites, all the aquatics emails, the changes in all the schedules that pop up and the teens not delivering the information in a timely manner, I guess this is just the way it is for now.  Not to mention, the SAT prep classes, the SAT test, the ACT test and the driving to colleges and looking for a summer job and all the homework and AP tests.  I went to a great college and don’t remember anything in high school being this crazy busy.

At this age we and the teachers put all of the communication through the kids, so that they grow up to take care of themselves, but things fall through the cracks and there are the unexpected things. 

Thank goodness Stewart drives himself around and Jennifer will be driving herself in a few months.  Maybe we will have all this down by the time Jacqueline’s a senior:)

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Is Everybody a Badass?

My son is on the verge of being a senior in high school.  He and his friends are full of the energy and optimism of youth and inexperience.  They’re fit, strong, and bright young men and women that have a bit of swagger to them, but are they any different from anyone else at that age.

My older daughter is on the verge of being a a sophomore and isn’t so impressed with this group of  upperclassmen.  Her and her friends seem to want to throw their hat into the ring as the best and the brightest and the prettiest and the most sensitive and the most caring.  They’re  just a bunch Mother Theresa’s those female freshman.

My youngest daughter is still in elementary school and I can assure you that she and her friends think they know everything.  I can’t seem to tell them anything that they don’t already know.  From this, you must deduce that they think they’re the best of the best.

I remember a mom a couple of years ago that informed me that my son and his friends were an immature and childish group( yeah, they were in the ninth grade).  Her son and his friends(upperclassmen) were mature and smart and really with it.  It seems the parents get into this line of thinking also.  It gets even better when I hear parents constantly bragging about their children and trying to tell you they are better than the next coming of the savior.  Their gpa is this, they took these classes and they are on these sports teams.  Big deal.  My kids do all the same stuff. 

I say let’s be proud of our kids within reason.  What we are really trying to do is raise good solid citizens who are going to carry this country forward as we start to fade into the twilight of our lives in the next 25 years.  Being realistic, there are only going to be a handful of kids from each class that go onto the upper echelons of what we define as success in this country.  Those individuals are unique people that see the world in a different lense than the rest of us are the true leaders, movers and shakers of our society.  I’ve seen people from very meager upbringing accomplish great things and I’ve seen people with all the advantages in the world turn out to be total creeps.  The kids are going to find people that are smarter, brighter, faster, stronger or whatever than themselves.  Prepare them for the competition, but don’t hand them the trophy before their adult life begins.

Am I saying don’t do your best?  Am I saying don’t strive?  Am I saying don’t push and challenge yourself?  I’m not saying any of those things.  If you were one of those who were telling everyone that your kid knew the alphabet at two years old, then I can’t help you.  If you’re caught up a bit in which college your kid got into, then you might want to curb your pride a little.  American hubris seems to be more of a worldwide disease than a sought after trait.  When I’m on my soap box, hobby horse or in any other elevated state, I seem to fall pretty hard.  The fall keeps us humble.

If anyone is interested, the class of 1985 was the baddest of them all.

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The Road to Good Intentions

In this business climate, I am looking at different options and opportunities.  I was referred to a program that came out of the American  Reinvestment and Recovery Act, otherwise known to you as the “stimulus package.”   This program is aimed at getting a certain segment of the retail businesses to buy energy efficient LED lighting and some other measures.  I sat in the training for one full day and listened to all of the things they had to say.  Basically, it boils down to the government wanting them to buy energy efficient lighting so that we use less energy.  Okay, whose not down with that?

We’re supposed to go around to small businesses and give them proposals to install LED lighting.  We ‘re asking small businesses to spend up to possibly several thousand dollars (after rebates and incentives) depending on the size of the business and explain the payback to them.  The question was asked if SDGE was backing this program because they provide zero percent financing for energy efficiency projects.  The answer was no.  Then there was a discussion of how are we going to get small business owners in this climate to buy several thousand dollars worth of lights?  It ain’t gonna happen.  Cash is too valuable right now and people are spending it on what they need, especially small business.  If I have working lights, then I don’t need new ones.

Secondly, the other measures weren’t even applicable to most of the market they were going after, so that was useless.

Thirdly, all participants are required to pay prevailing wages(union wages).  I don’t know too many small business owners who are willing to pay the guys installing the lights $47/hour.  I can get guys to install lights for $12/hour.

Fourthly, after three months in the program you’re supposed to hire someone since this is part of the “jobs program.”  Well, I don’t need or want to hire anyone additional right now. 

I had a few suggestions for the project manager of the program where it could easily make the program worthwhile and viable, but they  weren’t interested.  Maybe the government should stop trying to create jobs and leave that to the private market.  I would like to see the government shrink considerably.  I would like to see a balanced budget.  I would like to see tax cuts.  I would like to see pension reform.  I would like to see salaries drop.  I would like to see the troops brought home.

I recently did a project for a client for $36,555.00.  The city extracted over $6,000.00 in permit fees from me and my client, almost 17% of the project cost.  Politicians and government employees just don’t get it because they’re insulated from all of this, but there’s a reason the tea party exists.  It really doesn’t matter if you’re democrat or republican, this crap needs to stop.

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Dating in The 21st Century

When you have teenagers, you eventually,  at some point have to deal with the interactions of male and female.  Long gone are the days of skateboarding for four straight hours or choreographing dances for hours with your friend in front of the bedroom mirror.  The girls become boy crazy and the boys are well, you know.  The wife and I told our oldest that he couldn’t date or have a girlfriend until sixteen years of age.  Why this date?  We have no idea.  It just sounded like a good milestone if you know what I mean.  Well, he wasn’t satisfied with that and went out and got himself a girlfriend at fifteen.  It immediately brought me back to my high school days and unpleasant interactions with my parents in regards to dating and girlfriends.  My gut reaction told me that just because we’re not ready doesn’t mean he’s not ready and we need to go on his time table and not ours.  I am happy with that decision thus far and I think it was right on.

That girlfriend came and went.  A year has passed and now we have a new young lady on the horizon.  However, things are a bit different this time because they’re driving!  I remember the days of driving around with my girlfriend.  Is this not a right of passage in America?  Cruising the streets on Saturday night with your hottie snuggled up against you.  Well, not anymore.  This wonderful thing called the government has intruded into our lives once again.  Please spare yourself from sending me emails on teen driving safety.  You can’t have a passenger in the car until your seventeen.  I personally think this stinks for the kids and I know there are a lot of people who disagree with me.  This sure doesn’t deter the kids.  They don’t know any better.  It is actually very cute to watch my son drive off and his girlfriend follow right behind in her car.  A lot of gas is being burned, but who cares about air quality. 

The driving laws have actually changed things more than you think.  We are delaying responsibility, accountability, and discipline another year.  It’s what I call the pampering of America.  It has also caused a lot of temptation and peer pressure onto the teen driver to take on passengers.  It can put families that were on good terms with eachother into a difficult spot based on your personal feelings on the whether the law is right or not.  “Why can’t my daughter just ride with your daughter to soccer practice?”  It’s against the law that’s why.  I see lots of teens that have no interest in getting their driver’s license.  I have even seen parents discourage their teens from driving.  I don’t have any data but I would put money on the government influencing people’s thoughts over the years and subtly changing the laws slow enough that no one notices because we all only have our teens for a handful of years anyways and we’re off to other things by the time these events are upon us.

The most bizarre invention I’ve heard of is the “group date.”  Where you never have a boyfriend or girlfriend or date anyone and a group of people just hang out.  It’s great to hang out and you can always find someone to hang out with, but eventually there needs to be one on one interactions between the sexes.  They need to learn how to cope and deal with the opposite sex in a one on one setting where their beliefs and upbringing can be tested, where temptation is resisted or given into, where that fine line between fun and flirtatious and inappropriate is found and mommy and daddy or Uncle Sam can’t be in the back seat of the car saying don’t do that.  Can pop culture be imitating society with the Lady Gaga generation, androgynous metrosexuals?  I hope not, all in the spirit of teaching these youngsters to be ladies and gentlemen.

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Ships Passing in the Night

This is my son’s junior year in high school and he has participated in athletics the entire time he has been at Rancho Buena Vista High School.  I have watched him play football, swim for the swim team and now be on the water polo team for the first time.  I can tell as an outsider looking in, the swim/water polo program and the football program are going completely opposite directions.

His freshman year, I encouraged him to play football for a couple of different reasons.  Number one being that everyone is so hard core anymore you need to get in on the ground floor because if you try out your sophomore or junior year they won’t know or care who you are unless you’re a dominating athlete.  Number two reason being this is the only time in your life you can play organized tackle football for free and it’s a lot of fun.  He was small for his age and hadn’t had a growth spurt yet, but earned himself a starting wide receiver spot on the team.  The team was lackluster in performance.  The coaching is poor, the scheme is terrible and the kids collectively didn’t have any team speed.  Move onto sophomore year and it’s more of the same.  I think the jv team only won a single game all season.  I knew there was something wrong with the football program when my son broke his leg at the beginning of the season and not a single coach or representative from the football program called or emailed to see how he was doing.  I am happy to say that he is not playing football this year.

It looked like it was going to be more of the same with the water polo program this year and I was disappointed for Stewart.  The varsity coach didn’t show up to practice occasionally this summer and missed a couple of the matches.  It left me to think what the hell is wrong with athletics at  RBV?  Lo and behold, the varsity water polo coach was either fired or resigned and immediately replaced.  What a breath of fresh air!  The new coach came in with qualifications and set the tone immediatley.  You can already see that the other coaches, all the players and the parents are buying into this new guy!  Everyone is positive, the kids are practicing hard and the coach has some serious expectations of these teens.  I like it.  I’m pumped and looking forward to going to the matches and learning about a new sport.

We had a bbq in our backyard over the holiday weekend and someone mentioned that the RBV varsity football team lost 52-0 on Friday night.  Inexcusable.  I really feel for all those kids, several of whom I have known since they were little boys,  who have spent four years of their life to be coached to such a poor level.  These kids lift weights all winter, spend their entire summers at the football field and this is the end result.  Don’t blame it on the kids.  RBV is the most populous school in San Diego county and there are athletes to be had for this football team.  My daughter dances for Maroon Magic and will be dancing at half-time at the home games but you’re not going to get any money out of me to watch bad football.  I don’t watch it on Saturday or Sunday and I’m not going to watch bad football on Friday nights either.  I will save my cash and show up at halftime for free to watch my daughter and head on back home.

I will tell you what I am going to do.  I am spending twenty bucks or so in gas money to drive to La Jolla HS on Friday and Saturday to enjoy the great energy and positiveness and work ethic from these water polo players and coaches.

Someone at RBV was man enough to make the change in the water polo program, now they got to man up and make a change in the football program.  If it’s “all about the children,” then by God get some new coaches in there for these young men.

Out.

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Bang Your Head

Went to a show last Saturday night.  The band was doing its thing.  The mosh pit started and then the crowd parted and there was Kiki Dee.   Weezer

I did go to a show last Saturday night.  I took four teenagers and a nine year old to the Weezer concert at the Del Mar Race Track.  I think the evening left as much an impression on me as it did the kids.  It all started when we arrived after race five and I was delighted to find out all the kids got in free.  Money for the ponies!  We didn’t win anything on that account, but oh well.

After the ninth race, we headed on over to the venue which was in the infield.  If you haven’t been to the track, the infield is the center of the racetrack.  We set up our blankets and lawn chairs and cooler.  My sixteen year old son and his buddy wanted to get as close as possible, so they meandered their way up with my friend’s 11 year old son and friend.  My fourteen year old daughter and her friend weaved their way up front also.  I figured they’re fourteen and I need to let them roam around a little.  Jacqueline and I hung out in the back.

The whole concert was enjoyable.  Jacqueline sat on my shoulders most of the time and sang out loud to the songs she knew.  I told my wife later on that she was a babe magnet.  All the women wanted to come up and meet her and give her a high five because she is so cute.

When the teens returned I was regaled by their stories of being up front and close to the band.  My son, his buddy and the 11 year olds entered the mosh pit and got punched in the face, kneed in the head and tossed all over.  They helped crowd surf a guy into the hands of security.  They watched a guy throw a turkey leg at Weezer and he dodged and then picked it up and took a bite out of it.  The two teen girls had popcorn dumped on them.  They were offered a joint repetitively and declined.  Thank the Lord.  They watched two chicks get into a cat fight and got to bop the giant beach balls that were bouncing around the crowd a couple of times.  Quite an earful for a dad standing just a couple hundred feet away but separated by a throng of thousands.

If that wasn’t enough, getting out of that place was skechy.  The only way out is an unlit underground tunnel about twenty feet wide for 10,000 people.  I told the kids to just relax for awhile and wait for the crowd to die down.  The crowd never seemed to die down.  I asked a security guard about another exit and he said they had just opened a gate where we could walk across the racetrack.  We headed that way but there was no open gate and hundreds of people just started jumping the fence and so did we.  I lifted Jacqueline over and then the cooler.  Jennifer hopped over and then came security yelling  at us to back away from the fence.  I wasn’t about to be separated from my daughters so I jumped the fence anyway and the rest of the kids followed.  We ran across the turf and we ran across the track.  It was during this that I noticed the rail the horses follow around the track was already toppled over in many sections and the bushes destroyed.  I yelled to the kids, “Run fast because the cops are going to be coming!”  The guy next to me said that was the funniest bit of parenting he had ever witnessed.  As soon as we got into the parking lot the squad cars were pulling in.

I don’t think I’ve ever had so much fun with my kids and I don’t think they’ll ever forget the night we went to see Weezer.

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Thoughts on Independence Day

Everyone in America is from somewhere else.  Back in the day, it used to just be European colonists, but now we have people from China, Japan, India, Russia, South America and a host of other smaller nations.  From the 1600’s until now, people have been coming here to make a better life for themselves, to  find opportunities that didn’t exist at home, to escape political persecution, and to escape communism, tyranny and despotism. 

I really can’t blame all of the Mexican people that are trying to flee their country to come to the Disneyland of the world, the United States, especially when we’re within walking distance.  They are just trying to do what all Americans before them have done and that is to make a better life for themselves and their families.  There is a lot of talk about how to control the southern border which seems to be a gargantuan task if you ask my opinion.  What should be done about it?  It’s too big a question for me.  It’s definitely something that needs to be debated wisely and judiciously with the best of our best to come to some kind of decision through the political process.

Side bar.  I think of my wife’s grandfather.  He came here in the early 1960’s from Australia.  In conversations with him, it came down to the fact that he didn’t think he could make a good living in Australia due to lack of opportunity, the societal set up, or the existing business climate.  He felt England would be much the same, so he decided on the states.  There are interesting behaviors to all first generation immigrants.  I’ve noted with my wife’s family and with many Mexican families that I know that the first generation clings very strongly to their heritage.  I think of it as being the stranger in a strange land.  It is self evident in many of the big cities that used to and still do have strong Italian, Greek, Russian, Irish neighborhoods.  Complete assimilation of first generation immigrants is not impossible but definitely improbable.

From first hand experience, the children of immigrants are definitely Americanized due to the schooling process and the friendships they develop.  I always find it interesting with my wife, when I say a little anecdote or limerick that is truly American and she has never heard it.  How can that be?  It’s due to the disconnect between what is being learned during the day at school and the discussions at the family dinner table at night.  The assimilation is almost complete.  Now, when you get to my children, there is total assimilation.  They are as American as someone whose family has been here for generations.  The country their grandparenst are from is a distant country like Ireland or France is to me.

There is a lot of complaining amongst us and in the media about the U.S.-Mexico border and the illegal aliens walking into the states everyday.  All we can do is blame ourselves for our lack of effort, decisiveness and decision making in these matters.  Can we really control a thousand mile long border where most of it is in a desert wasteland?  and to what expense?  Is this really what we’re about?

Maybe we should be a little more welcoming, get these people Americanized and assimilated faster than the third generation.  We should promote citizenship.  Just think, once they’re signed up, you can take their fingerprints, get them a social security number and tax the crap out of them like the rest of us!

So next time you interact with an immigrant, tell them the story of George Washington chopping down the cherry tree or Abe Lincoln reading books by lantern light or an anecdote from Mark Twain.  The only way they can learn about us, is if we tell them.

Happy 4th of July!

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